I just wish the initiation wouldn't have been so hard.
OCT 28, 2009
I was thinking today, that only a month ago I was running around dressed up like a crazy flapper celebrating my 30th Birthday, and now remembering it makes it seem like it was years ago. I laugh at how important I thought that day was.
I feel like I've had to grow up so much in just one month of being 30-far more than I ever had in the 29 years before. My body feels it, my head feels it, and of course my heart feels it. I can literally feel every beat my heart makes inside my chest, or at least I'm more aware of it, I guess I should say.
I don't want this blog entry to be sad, because I'm not sad, I'm happy. I'm SO SO happy that Samuel is home, that it's been days without a fever, and that we might actually be able to start getting him healed. I'm SO SO happy that we have the Gospel, the priesthood, and the love and support from so many people on our side. In the quiet moments at the hospital, when I'd let my mind wander to places that are scary, I could feel the gospel, feel the power of the priesthood, and feel the love and support of those who were praying on our behalf. It was those prayers that pulled me out of the scary places, and let the holy ghost comfort me and calm me down.
Being home this time around I knew I had to be calm and rational. I haven't checked Sam's temperature every five minutes, I have hardly checked it at all actually. Each time I get scared and my heart pounds in my chest, I remind myself that I have faith in the priesthood blessings that Sam received, that I have faith in the Fast that we did on Sunday, and that I have Faith that Heavenly Father knows me and has heard not only my prayers, but countless prayers of others.
All this wisdomish talk must be because I'm now an official grown up. I wonder if there is a club? I hope it doesn't include red hats and purple feather boas...I don't think I'm quite there yet.
Anyway this blog entry was more for me to just express the jumble of thoughts floating around in my head, and to have a way to say Thank You to everyone who did, and is still praying for Sam to pull through this, and of course the prayers for our entire family. I feel so humbled to have felt your love and support. Thank You.
Well it's official...I'm now a grown up!
Sam walked up to me in the kitchen and when I looked down he was giving this little kitty a love. It was the sweetest thing and of course it made me start to cry...literally. Yes, I even took a picture through my tears. I HAD to.
After seeing him in that hospital bed for a week, strapped to all those monitors, this was a welcomed sight to see my little guy acting like a 20 month old should!
A pretty WEAK WEEK!
It's actually been a week plus some but it seems to all run together.
Anyway, Sam got a fever on Monday (Oct. 12), now, at 20 months fevers are reoccuring things with each tooth that comes in, but by Wednesday it hadn't gone away AND a rash started forming all over his body. By Thursday I stopped talking myself out of taking him in to see the Dr, and scheduled a time to go in. The Dr. took a swab to check for strep, and other illnesses like scarlet fever ect. but the test came back negative. The Dr. said that Sam's right lymphnode was pretty swollen, and he was unsure about the rash. He sent us home but told me he'd call me, which he did three times that night. The last call was when he had mentioned something called Kawasaki Disease. He told me that if the fever was still there in the morning that we'd have to go up to Primary' Children's. Well, Friday morning the fever and rash were still there so up to Primary's we went. We had to go to the ER and they had to get a urine sample (via Catheter) and place an IV and draw lots of blood. He was very sad and scared and I had to be the strong mom...even though my heart was breaking. Well they were not saying he HAD Kawasaki's but that is what they were going to start treating him for since he had all of the symptoms. They admitted us to the hospital and started a treatment called IVIG which is basically a bunch of other peoples antibodies (kind of like someone getting blood or plasma from someone else). Anyway the IVIG ran throughout most of the night and into the next morning, and it really seemed to help. His fever went down and the rash started going away. On Saturday afternoon they sedated him and did an ECHO (ultrasound) on his heart. Coming out of the sedation was a nightmare, he was literally kicking and screaming (poor guy).
The cardiologists found that his right coronary artery and his left anterior coronary artery both had inflammation in them. They began giving him high doses of aspirin and monitoring him. On Sunday the rash was barely visible and he hadn't had a fever since the IVIG treatment, so they told us we could go home, which was nice-for the 24 hours we were there. His fever came back on Monday night (Oct. 19) so back to the ER we went. It was about 9:00 pm when we went back and the ER was SO busy and there were tons of sick kids all over. We waited in the waiting room for 2 hours before we got a room. Then when we finally did get a room, we had to do everything that we did on Friday again. The second time around was definitely much worse. The blood test came back and said that the inflammation levels in his body had gone up, and so once again we had to be admitted to the hospital...of course we didn't get to our room until 3 in the morning. They started another round if the IVIG at about 5:30 am and it ran most of the day on Tuesday. His fever didn't go down as fast with the second treatment of IVIG but at least this time he didn't have the rash. Wednesday morning he went in for another ECHO and this time they didn't sedate him as much as before so when he came out of it he wasn't as irritable. The second ECHO actually showed that the coronary artery that was smaller was now bigger and the one that was bigger was now smaller, but neither of them were to a point that the doctors were overly concerned, they thought that with the aspirin therapy the inflammation in both will go away.
The second hospital stay went a little better for Sam (maybe because he'd been so used to everything the first time) he actually drank and ate. He was up and alert and wanted to play and talk. So Thursday they told us we could take him home if we felt comfortable, so we decided we wanted to try again, and that we'd just pray REALLY hard that he doesn't have to go back.
So now it's Friday (Oct. 23) and we are home. Sam is doing really well, he's eating, drinking and playing (not too hard) and his temperature is down, so let's all pray that it stays that way. We aren't out of the woods completely, and I have 6 weeks of giving him aspirin and monitoring him and then he'll have another ECHO to see where we stand.
I'm so thankful for all the thoughts and prayers from everyone, it is amazing to feel that love when you are at your lowest. Your prayers really helped us get through this, especially the quiet moments when our minds would wander to not nice places. We will continue to keep you up-to-date on Sam and his condition and the progress he's making.
We love you all!
Pumpkin Patch and Haymaze
Over UEA I took the kids to the local pumpkin patch, and it was so fun watching them both run around trying to find "THE" pumpkin to take home. Sam spent a lot of time in the little pull cart letting Natalie pull him around. He kept pointing and saying "Punkeen, Punkeen" in that cute little voice of his. When we found suitable Punkeens I let the kids run and play in a little Haymaze that they have at the Pumpkin Patch. After last years hour of hauling the kids around the large Cornmaze I opted out of that this year, and just let them run wild in the Haymaze for a while...luckily there weren't too many other kids there.
After that we stocked up on Sweet Dumpling Squash (I LOVE THEM), payed for our bounty and headed home, but not before making a stop at McDonald's for Happy Meals...don't you just love days off from school?
September 30, 2009
This is what I see when I'm standing on the front porch!
As beautiful as that is...Come on Mother Nature, it's not even October yet!
