Well it's official...I'm now a grown up!

I just wish the initiation wouldn't have been so hard.
OCT 28, 2009
I was thinking today, that only a month ago I was running around dressed up like a crazy flapper celebrating my 30th Birthday, and now remembering it makes it seem like it was years ago. I laugh at how important I thought that day was.
I feel like I've had to grow up so much in just one month of being 30-far more than I ever had in the 29 years before. My body feels it, my head feels it, and of course my heart feels it. I can literally feel every beat my heart makes inside my chest, or at least I'm more aware of it, I guess I should say.
I don't want this blog entry to be sad, because I'm not sad, I'm happy. I'm SO SO happy that Samuel is home, that it's been days without a fever, and that we might actually be able to start getting him healed. I'm SO SO happy that we have the Gospel, the priesthood, and the love and support from so many people on our side. In the quiet moments at the hospital, when I'd let my mind wander to places that are scary, I could feel the gospel, feel the power of the priesthood, and feel the love and support of those who were praying on our behalf. It was those prayers that pulled me out of the scary places, and let the holy ghost comfort me and calm me down.
Being home this time around I knew I had to be calm and rational. I haven't checked Sam's temperature every five minutes, I have hardly checked it at all actually. Each time I get scared and my heart pounds in my chest, I remind myself that I have faith in the priesthood blessings that Sam received, that I have faith in the Fast that we did on Sunday, and that I have Faith that Heavenly Father knows me and has heard not only my prayers, but countless prayers of others.
All this wisdomish talk must be because I'm now an official grown up. I wonder if there is a club? I hope it doesn't include red hats and purple feather boas...I don't think I'm quite there yet.
Anyway this blog entry was more for me to just express the jumble of thoughts floating around in my head, and to have a way to say Thank You to everyone who did, and is still praying for Sam to pull through this, and of course the prayers for our entire family. I feel so humbled to have felt your love and support. Thank You.

1 comment:

Katie said...

Let it all out. We have to talk about stuff or we go crazy.